She’s Gotta Have It: Your Side piece Couldn’t Handle A Nola Darling Thanksgiving


I’ve always had an affinity for Nola Darling (Tracy Camilla Johns), the fictional character Spike Lee created in his first feature film,She’s Gotta Have Itand now a Netflix series. Spike created a woman who did exactly what she wanted. Nola was a natural Brooklyn baddie; she had a harem of guys simply because she could. And each of her men served a different purpose.

Mars Blackmon (Spike Lee) was the gump with a good heart and was fun to kick it with. Greer Childs (John Canada Terrell) was a handsome, rich narcissist. And Jamie Overstreet (Tommy Redmond Hicks) was a stable, overprotective alpha male. Each suitor had his virtues, but Nola just couldn’t make up her mind.

She’s Gotta Have It showed us that when a man has a lot of sexual partners, they are looked at as “the man.” But when a woman has a lot of partners she is looked at as a nymphomaniac. Spike Lee pretty much took these stereotypes and turned them around.

One can only imagine how a modern day Nola Darling would be similar to Erykah Badu, with pieces of let’s say a young Instagram vixen. It’s not a debate of if “hoes are winning.” It’s more of a discussion on doing what you want. I mean, IG models having fun while dating rappers and they haven’t burst into flames as others want to believe. Erykah Badu has multiple baby daddies, yet she is still MUVA. Maybe Future is right, “you do what you want when you’re popping.”

Nola showed how popping she was when she decided she wanted to spend Thanksgiving with all three of her lovers. She invited all three men to break bread together. In the real world would that even fly? Can you imagine inviting all your side pieces to dinner and chatting about Donald Trump and LaVar Ball? Or discussing how Jaden Smith’s debut album, SYRE knocks?

Nola’s Thanksgiving worked because all of her men knew about each other. She didn’t play no games with them. And she wasn’t silly with her affairs like, how Ty Dolla Sign sings of buying both of his chicks the same perfume and Louboutins. Or how people send the same, “Good Morning heart face emoji” to their suitors. Nola’s dinner with multiple baes worked because she actually had personality, creativity, and substance. She dated her men.

This kind of Thanksgiving dinner is a fictitious G move. I personally wouldn’t try it, I don’t want no blood on my hands. But Spike Lee has always been ahead of his time. Nola was giving us a Love and Hip-Hop love triangle realness in the 80s.

Do you think you could invite your side pieces to a peaceful Thanksgiving dinner?

I'm in Thailand! Here's Why I'm Traveling With One Love Travel Club!

If someone would have told me that my 2016 would be lit I wouldn't have believed them. At the start of 2016, I was in LA on the struggle bus. I was broke, I had an unsavory living condition, I was working at the whitest startup making no money. I was depressed. LA was no good to me. I ended up talking to Necole Kane of and I told her my frustrations and how I was about to pack up everything and go back to Baltimore. Necole stated that sometimes you have to take a step back to step forward and that you can reset your life as many times as you want to. 

And what a reset it has been. The level up has been so real! God will level you all the way up if you let Him. So as I type this post in Thailand just know that if God can do it for me than He can do for it you.

I'm traveling with a travel club. I picked One Love Travel Club because I love One Love's values. Wherever the club goes within each country, the travelers must volunteer. While One Love schedules the activities and events for all the travels, all are optional,  except the volunteering day. And I love to give back. And yes, I do volunteer in the states as well (for all those who side eye volunteering aboard). 

Honestly, Thailand was never on my radar to travel to but One Love's Classic Thailand itinerary was way too popping. I loved the fact that it's summer in Thailand, I loved the multiple days at the beach, the Thai cooking class course and the scooter tour. One Love plans awesome trips. 

And they provide payment plans for those who can't drop all the coins for their trip at once (me!). I am not ashamed of layaway! I even put my airplane ticket to Thailand on layaway, I used STA Travels. I flew out of NYC because it was cheaper than flying out of Baltimore's BWI and I put down a deposit and I had up until seven days before my trip to pay off my flight ticket.

Ballin on a budget.

Check out One Love Travel Club here and be sure to follow my Phuket and Bangkok adventures on Snapchat (FlyCarla410).  

And for those who have been following my dating adventures via my podcast, why come, I met a single, professional, no kids, Black man from Baltimore in the Shanghai airport? I walk into Starbucks and see this guy wearing a Ravens hat and I asked him if he was from Bmore. We both had long layovers and we ended up chatting until the morning and until we had to board our flights. He was leaving Thailand to head back to Baltimore and I on my way to Thailand. God has the funniest humor. 

Be sure to check out my new podcast where I spill more tea on our chance meeting and how Big Sean's "What A Year" is my fourth quarter theme song.